Today as a Male Military Spouse - Her Support

Today as a Male Military Spouse - Her Support

image for Today as a Male Military Spouse - Her Support

Image: – Today as a Male Military Spouse - Her Support by Taurus M. James – Macho Spouse

 

Taurus and Trauna JamesLearning the support role as a male military spouse was very, VERY difficult for me. When I look back, I point to my pride and immaturity as major factors in my slow learning and acceptance of the role.

I changed over time, but time did not change me. I had to continuously choose to "fall back" and develop this as a way of thinking. That's not an easy thing to do when you're an aggressive, no-nonsense dude like me. Faith in Christ is what changed my mind and changed me, allowing me see that love requires that I demonstrate what it is to be my wife's support in a sacrificial manner.

Here is something for Valentine's Day - a re-post of one of my blog entries about demonstrating my love and support for my wife after a difficult week.


It is the end of a tough week for my wife. She had some VIPs and had to deliver a briefing today. After 16 years as a male military spouse, I think I've finally learned how to give her the best support.

Friday is always a good day. The feeling of coasting downhill is what I have and it makes the hilly drive to pick up my daughter from school a lot more enjoyable.

Today was really about cleaning up and making a relaxing environment for my wife so she could really get comfortable, unwind her mind and get rid of the stress. So, I tackled housekeeping tasks throughout the day, focusing on the areas of high impact - bathrooms, bedrooms and laundry.

When she arrived at home, she acknowledged the effort immediately by stating that I must have read her mind. I laughed and replied: "We're 40. We have the same mind."

We've been together now for 19 years. I know my wife. She knows me. I'm no longer afraid of this fact. This is one key to success in this marriage and my role.

I'm my wife's MWR, her support. Corny, but true. While she's out front, I've got her back.

Taking care of my wife means taking care of my health first, our daughter second, and then the rest of the home-front. I don't have to do it all in one day, but in a day, I have to do it all. I don't have to overwhelm myself by thinking that I have to accomplish everything in one day. But I do have to work daily towards accomplishing the things that are most important to my family.

My heart goes out to all of the military spouses who are trying their best to figure this thing out, especially to all of the male military spouses. There are many books written about this life and many opinions on how to go about it.

Advice I give to new male military spouses today: Together with your active duty spouse, plot your own course and learn to adjust along the way to get where you want to go. Don't be afraid to be wrong. Be quick to accept correction and move on.

Today as a military spouse, I learned that the best way to support my wife after a tough week is to make her home relaxing and comfortable and give her room to breathe.

Be encouraged. It's Friday.

Taurus James is an Air Force male military spouse and stay-at-home-dad, minister, musician and composer of Moody instruMental Music. He is also professional IT Consultant and Web Developer with over ten years experience working within various industries. Find out more about Taurus through his blog:

"Faithwalk Music: Faith, Music and Life of a Moody instruMental Musician"

See also...

image for Real Life Roland blog by Dee Young - Army Male Spouse

Real Life Roland blog by Dee Young - Army Male Spouse

Real Life Roland

I am Roland Burton.....ok, so I'm not "actually" Roland Burton, but if you watch the show "Army Wives", then you are familiar with the lone male military spouse. I've been married to a Soldier since 2006 and that is exactly how I've felt throughout the years. I've only met one other male military spouse during this time, but I have connected with a few wonderful female military spouses over the years that have accepted me with open arms and made the transition from duty station to duty station much easier. We have two beautiful girls and we love the military life. My name is Dee and I am a "Real Life Roland".

 

Visit the Real Life Roland blog
image for Take Your Smoothie & Suck It

Take Your Smoothie & Suck It

SmoothieFlag.jpgSo this post on Stars and Stripes is currently making the rounds on social media and is kicking up quite a bit of dust. Historically I'm a sucker for these types of “opinion pieces” primarily because I love reading the comments, and the follow-up commentary on this post didn't disappoint. However, most people seemed to have missed Mr. Duffy's thinly veiled insult to military family members; as well as, a very lousy marketing and public relations policy.



 

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