Being Dad

Being Dad

image for Being Dad

Image: – – Macho Spouse

 

EverettDaughter.jpgNever really thought about that word “dad” until I became one; however, I focus more on it now than ever before. I find that the word “dad” means more to me today because my own father wasn't there for me when I was growing up, and he's still not around, not even for his own granddaughter. Yes, the word “dad” means more to me now than ever. My ability to be a good father comes from more than one source, and the fact that I choose not to be like my old man is a great motivator. My dad left by way of divorce when I was just seven. There was no custody battle and he was given every opportunity to see his children. Yet he still chose not to be around.


A year ago I had the opportunity to ask him why he was never around and he referred back to his own dad not being there when he grew up. For him, the cycle continued and was handed down in that way to his children. I have made it a point to break that cycle and be there for my daughter in every way possible. I do this so she will have the confidence that she needs handle this crazy world both socially and emotionally. From the past diaper changes, to a future walk down the aisle; I'm making this a lifetime adventure. I taught preschool for the Navy before my daughter was born and that has also helped lay some good groundwork for the job ahead of me. I use methods of redirection, praise, and open-ended questions that I learned from my teaching experience to better raise my daughter. I also believe my faith had a role in preparing me to become a good dad because I believe that things happen for a reason. And the reason I chose a career in childcare all those years ago, I believe, was a way to prepare me to become a better father than my own.

The way I cheer for my daughter in whatever activity she does may be from the lack of support from my own parents. Very rarely would my Mom show up for a concert, parade or field show. I played Tuba in school and still play today. My dad was never there, even when he lived close enough to see me perform. So we just got my daughter into a soccer club and it's been a wonderful thing to share with my daughter. This club allows parents to help teach their children soccer by participating in her practice sessions. We are able to teach by example. It's great to see all the other dads interact with their kids while having fun. Times like the ones my daughter and I share are times when valuable memories are made.

It is said, “To whom much is given, of him shall much be required.” With that in mind I see my role as a dad as big one. From the good times all the way to the bad times, being a dad is a great role. As dads we must all find a way to teach, love and to teach love. What we do now will have long lasting results. Whether they are negative or positive results resides with us. We must enjoy being “Dad.” If you aren't enjoying this responsibility, find help. Look to friends or professionals and find the resources you need to make being “Dad” a bit easier. Don't be afraid to take a look at where you may need help and fix or modify those areas. As men we may see getting help as a weakness. It isn't. In fact, I consider finding help an investment. An investment with a greater return is always a good choice. Make the most of your time with your child(ren). They are young for only a limited time. We, as dads, should enjoy it now and as much as we can.

See also...

image for SAHD Life: My First Daddy-Daughter Dance

SAHD Life: My First Daddy-Daughter Dance

Father-Daughter Sweetheart Ball - Picture Booth

The YMCA Adventure Guides Father-Daughter Sweetheart Ball was not on my radar until a good friend of mine told me how he takes his daughters each year. I thought, "Cool! You and your girls are really excited about this thing, huh?" When my wife started getting emails about the event, there was no controlling her excitement. She was even talking about renting a car for the night!

Yeah...

In case you didn't know (like me), a daddy-daughter dance allows dad an opportunity to set an example and standard for how his daughter should be treated on a date. It is also an opportunity for dad to build that special bond with his daughter and make special memories.

Okay, based on the description above, I tossed the whole daddy-daughter dance thing out the window because my daughter and dating don't even go together in a sentence. And I can build that special bond with my daughter at the creek - FISHING!

But I thought about the whole thing (I do a lot of thinking) and with my "try-almost-anything-once" attitude, I went all in.

That's right! I went to my first daddy-daughter dance AND I LOVED IT!

image for Marine to SAHD: Milestones

Marine to SAHD: Milestones

AndrewWebPic copy.jpgThis article is a piece of information that has helped me capture milestones for my loved one who is always at work.  I know that it can be difficult so I hope this helps someone down the line.

I know that it has been awhile since I have written anything regarding Twin life but here is why. MILESTONES! The girls are almost one and a half years old now and the milestones have been piling up. From saying their first words to walking and the list continues to grow each day. As a stay at home dad and the love of my life working during the day it is expected that she will miss things in person. This can be depressing for our loved ones but I have found that the smartphone is my best friend when it comes to this. I take pictures and videos constantly so she does not feel like she is missing everything. As male military spouses we have to understand that we are that small percent as our wives are in the military community. We miss out on special time with our wives because they work, and they miss out on milestones and this can be daunting for some. We can use our smartphones for good and show them that we do care and we understand the sacrifices they make. I hope this helps any dad out there having trouble showing their wife that they do love them and understand. This has helped me with my twin girls and my marriage; I just hope it helps someone else out there.



 

Comments


Got something to say? Sign up or login to participate in the conversation.